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Almost Dickless

by Amy Zidell

I didn't think Donald Trump's, "Here's my hands..." and, "...I'm just fine," response to Marco Rubio's attacks on Trump's apparently small hands was a big deal. The presumption that hand size is code referring to penis size has everything to do with the assumptions of the audience. If you thought penis, penis is on your brain. Though it seems, the penis presumption is what some find offensive. If hand size is relative to foot size does that mean you have a squat cobbler worthy foot fetish? I think not.

What I know is that debate audiences have been showered with 'pissing contests' in pretty much every debate since debates were invented. No doubt that Lincoln / Douglas debate watchers saw hand size up close. Aren't we told to size up candidates? What's with the size shaming now?

Whatever you think of the display from Thursday night's (March 3, 2016) GOP debate on Fox News, the biggest dick was absent, but its presence felt. No, I don't mean Ben Carson. He's a good guy. I refer to Mitt Romney.

An emerging nickname on Twitter is, Stiff Romney, borrowing influence from Donald Trump describing Mitt as Stiff. I think Dick has an even better ring -- Dick Romney. The reason Dick Romney is such a giant dick was fully on display for all to see during his disgraceful 'special announcement' earlier Thursday. On his own, Dick may not possess as big a dick as he represents because he is holding himself out as the head of the GOP and the Political Consultancy Industrial Complex, which includes lobbyists. His hit piece had him functioning, as it were, as the tip of the desperate but flaccid spear of aforementioned Establishment. I won't keep you hanging; I will confirm your connecting the dots: this does make Dick Romney the Establishment foreskin.

As a passionate Trump supporter, this is the first time I may actually get to vote for my first choice in a multi candidate Republican primary. That is exciting and unlike some other Twitter trending items about pill use, I don't need a pill for that. I don't need a dick for that either. I don't need a dick telling me what to do, and I won't be bringing a dick with me to my polling place to mark my ballot.

Trump, Donald Trump, GOP, Romney, Mitt Romney, Marco Rubio, Fox News, GOP Debate, establishment, political consultants, lobbyists, squat cobbler

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